Jane Austen laid out a road map for finding the right mate in her 6 novels. Decency is a big hit (think Col. Brandon) as well as wit (Mr. Tilney) and charm and mystery (Mr. Darcy). This is a short, fun list for finding the right man.

Source: Bookbub.com

16 Things Jane Austen Taught Us About Finding the Right Man

By Abigail Chandler
March 12, 2020
2 min read

Many of us learned everything we know about love from Jane Austen books. Luckily, her books are filled with inspiring romances that readers still aspire to today, as well as cautionary tales about the sort of romance you definitely don’t want.

Here are some of the lessons that Jane Austen taught us about finding the right man.

1. Aim high.

OK, waiting for your Mr. Darcy might be reaching for the stars. But you can definitely do better than a John Thorpe.

2. Holiday romances work.

Your perfect man is probably waiting for you in Bath RIGHT NOW.

3. The perfect man won’t necessarily spout elaborate declarations of love.

Silent admiration will do just fine, thank you.

4. Patience is a wonderful quality in a man.

Mr. Bennet doesn’t get enough credit.

5. The right man will be able to overcome his pride for you.

Everyone makes mistakes, and the ideal man — like Captain Wentworth — will forgive yours.

6. You need to know how to make an entrance.

You only get to make a first impression once. Why not make it from the back of a horse?

7. But remember that first impressions aren’t everything.

If Jane Austen taught us anything, it’s that first impressions — and even second, third, and fourth impressions — are often wrong.

8. Don’t waste your time on a man who’s clearly no good.

Projects aren’t worth it.

9. Don’t underestimate a good sense of humor.

A man who makes you laugh is just as attractive as a man with dashing good looks.

10. Decency is one of the most underrated, but vital qualities in a man.

A man who can put aside his own pride for the greater good is a keeper.

11. Learn to read between the lines.

Men aren’t always great communicators.

12. Shared interests are crucial for a strong relationship.

Tell me more about the prices of muslin, Mr. Tilney.

13. Always be ready when opportunities arise.

The right man won’t always just fall into your lap — sometimes gentle meddling is required.

14. A good man is secure with himself.

You don’t want a man who’s going to get insanely jealous whenever another man looks at you.

15. The perfect man is not always easy to find.

You’ve got to sift through a lot of inappropriate men to find him.

16. Most importantly, you need to be happy being alone with yourself.

Austen’s heroines are always just fine on their own — which is why they attract such great men.